Bear with me; I’m try to quell the urge to rip McCain signs from people’s lawns

Sharing this article. Politics, women’s issues, and Atwood, all tossed together by a super-smart Jezzie editor. And I do love The Handmaid’s Tale, in a makes-me-feel-stabby kind of way.

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“Dying Of Too Much Choice”: Sarah Palin And The Handmaid’s Tale

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One nice thing about The Handmaid’s Tale is, like Sarah Palin’s resume, it’s a pretty quick read. Basically the US has become a Christian theocracy where piety is required and women are chattel. They can’t have property or jobs, and they are forced into arranged marriages or disturbing functional roles. A few become whores, and get to hang out at a brothel called Jezebel’s. Others are Handmaids, so called because of a story in Genesis. Pollution has made most people sterile, but Handmaids are still believed to be fertile. Their job is to live with rich couples and have sex with the husbands — while the wives lie on the bed with them — in hopes of conceiving a child. The narrator, Offred, is one such Handmaid, and her description of the “fertilization” process (“My red skirt is hitched up to my waist. Below it the Commander is fucking. What he is fucking is the lower part of my body”) probably stuck with you if you read the novel in high school, for its sheer awful dehumanization of sex. The Handmaids are told they are better off than women before the theocracy, who were “dying of too much choice.”

So, is this the kind of world Sarah Palin wants to usher us into? Well, sort of. The Christian Heritage Week she signed into law in Alaska sounds like a far milder version of the state-sanctioned Prayvaganzas. When a group of Handmaids-to-be chants “her fault, her fault, her fault” at a rape victim, I thought of women in Wasilla paying for their own rape kits on Palin’s watch. And of course there’s the reverence for childbearing that permeates the culture of The Handmaid’s Tale, from the gruesome displays of executed abortionists to the arranged marriages of girls as young as fourteen in order to “start them soon.” All this is reminiscent of Palin’s avowed pro-life stance, a stance so unswerving it’s hard to imagine her daughter could have gone against it.

But does Sarah Palin actually want the US to turn into a Handmaid’s-Tale-style police state? No more than any of us. She’s not against women holding jobs — she’s a working mother of five. Nor would she, if elected, force us all to attend Prayvaganzas or have sex with other people’s husbands.

However, a character named Serena Joy should offer a chilling cautionary tale to Palin and her ilk. Before the theocracy, Serena Joy was a popular televangelist, preaching about the need for women to return to the home. Afterwards, she does just that, and she is trapped in an arranged marriage with knitting and gardening as her only occupations. Atwood writes:

She doesn’t make speeches anymore. She has become speechless. She stays in her home, but it doesn’t seem to agree with her. How furious she must be, now that she’s been taken at her word.

Sarah Palin hasn’t been as anti-woman as someone like Ann Coulter, whose persistence in asking people to listen to her while telling them women are stupid is a mind-boggling exercise in doublethink. But Palin does want to deprive women of the right to decide what we do with our bodies. And as The Handmaid’s Tale shows, women who want to take power away from women should be careful what they wish for.

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And if you’re at all concerned about animal cruelty, you might find Palin promoting the slaughtering of wolves and bears of interest. But be forewarned, the video I’m linking contains footage of animals being shot. From a plane. When the animals have no place to hide. Because there is no “sport” in Palin’s sort of hunting, just violence.

Oh, and a sweet $150 bonus for each severed foreleg you hand over.

But I don’t expect any better from her, because no mayor in her right mind asks about banning the books she doesn’t like and then claims she was just testing the librarian. (FYI they banned books in The Handmaid’s Tale too.)

Since my original birthday wish might have been more than anyone is realistically capable of, instead let me urge you, if you have not registered to vote, please do so. There is not much time left to register, so please please please make it a priority.

I can’t tell you who to vote for, but I can tell you that your vote really does make a difference.

Also consider writing the Department of Health and Human Services via the Planned Parenthood petition here (or any of the petitions linked here or here or here or here) concerning the “conscience rule”.

You may never want an abortion, and god forbid you ever need one, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a choice. Doctors shouldn’t be allowed to withhold information and pharmacists shouldn’t be permitted to deny you medication because it goes against their personal beliefs.

Other articles also worth noting:
The Case Against Sarah Palin – a compilation of statements made by Palin
McCain (Palin) On Women’s Issues: When It’s Not Sparse, It’s Not Good

I’m a victim of cellphone theft. ;___;

It actually happened on Wednesday. After I was assaulted that morning by my mother’s boyfriend and fled the house without food, (yeah, I can’t believe this is my life either) I stopped to buy something to eat in the late afternoon and I left my phone either A. on the counter when I went to get a drink or B. in the public bathroom. I didn’t realize it was gone until Saturday; I thought I had just left it in another handbag.

Doesn’t matter really, because whoever picked it up has no intention of returning it. It’s a safe bet s/he is not the Good Samaritan type by the company s/he keeps. Because I called my own phone. And then I called everyone who my phone called in the past couple days that I definitely did not call. And each time I felt I would have had better luck if I were asking for crack or pilfered car parts.

Actually, the fact that someone has stolen my phone, been listening to my voice mail, and has used up nearly all of my minutes calling and texting people doesn’t bother me. I mean, the phone looks nice, but it wasn’t super-expensive and it barely has any features. No camera or mp3 ringtones for Thiefy McStickyFingers to enjoy (though I did spend a ridiculous amount of time trying to program in a “Rainbow” midi which I’m sure s/he won’t appreciate).

It sucks, but I can replace the phone, no biggy. But I can’t replace my red tartan phone strap from Ayu’s Countdown Live 2007-2008 10th Anniversary concert. And that hurts. Not only is it Ayu’s cutest phone strap to date, but it marks Ayu’s first concert celebrating 10 years in the music industry and her last concert before confessing she permanently lost all hearing in her left ear. I even got the plaid shopping bag to match. T-T

There is no such thing as Good Country People

I’m trying to work on my research paper. I didn’t complete the first major assignment, so it is necessary that this final assignment be done and be done well.

The weather is nice today, so my room is like an oven. Too hot to be productive in. And my desk is too small for my task anyway.

So, I move my large stack of reference books, my pile of photocopies of literary criticism, my bundle of blank notecards, and a handful of pens, highlighters, and pencils into the downstairs dinning-room.

I take Jasper outside and wear him out so he’ll sit quietly while I work and not cry for attention. I get us both a cold drink.

I do all this and I’m ready to be productive! But. Outside I can hear people debating over the cost and amount of blocks needed to finish construction of a new wall and porch. Upstairs Jared playing War on Xbox Live, the volume so loud that sitting an entire floor away is the equivalent of sitting in the first row at an IMAX. And even over the sound of guns I can hear his usual commentary, “Come on.” “Fuck you.” “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

I open one of my Ibsen books anyway and begin reading. I get so far as “There was no biographical information even available in English until–” and he’s downstairs eating all things noisy and crunchy and turning the TV on, then turning it up to compete with the farm equipment outside.

I’m going to scream.

Come on. Fuck you. You’ve got to be kidding me.

My body is rebelling against me.

Either I’m very sick, or I’m on the most uncomfortable diet ever.

To make it all the worse, somewhere my BFF and a beloved friend I haven’t seen in forever are out having Friday Night Fun while I’m reduced to watching the first season of Medium. I’m expecting a “Sorry. Wished You Were There.” email any moment now.  :’(

Perks of being a girl / Give me some dazzle

I went out for Chinese food with Steph and Liz yesterday. Per usual, Steph split my chopsticks perfectly and was even kind enough to give me a moment to reconsider my wish before she broke them, as it’s on impulse that I wish for world peace (and who wants that?).

I wished to see Ayu in concert. But maybe I should have wished for an end to the writer’s strike.

Today, and for the past few days, I’ve been carrying around this:

It’s Rimmel Underground (of Rimmel London) Light Beam lip gloss, which I am totally in love with and carry around in my bag even when I’m not wearing it.

What makes it worth the precious purse space, you ask? Besides the usual glossy shine of oh-so-kissable lips, Rimmel’s Light Beam has a handy LED light in the lid (hence the name) and attached mirror.

The chance that I’ll actually be applying any makeup in the dark is quite small. But I would look this awesome if I did:

(If you want to know what I’ve really been wearing, it’s Neutrogena’s MoistureShine. But the packaging is not nearly as cool.)

The BFF and I are attempting to make Bella’s bracelet (from the Twilight book –and soon to be movie– series). I’d really love to order the official one, but it’s $65.00 and something about that Swarovski crystal seems off to me. It looks too… dirty. Or cloudy. When I think of Swarovski my first thought is of Ayu’s JEWEL PV and thus, I expect some sparkle.

But watch out, that jeweled leaf could take out an eye.

Ayu’s PV glitters like Edward’s skin.

Throughout the Twilight series Bella and her pals stress whether or not she’s ready to give up the human life and become a vampire. Good news for Bella, she can hang onto her soul and obtain immortality, a dazzling complexion and super powers all by drinking cranberry juice!

 Okay, not really. But it seems cranberries have amazing health benefits that only apply to women. How great is that?

…the refreshing red beverage has additional medicinal qualities as well. Prof. Ofek has found that cranberry juice exhibits anti-viral properties against the flu, can prevent cavities, and lessens the reoccurrence of gastric ulcers. Unhappily for half the human race, however, new research published this year in the journal Molecular Nutrition & Food Research on ulcers, suggests that, like urinary tract infections, the healing power of cranberries apply only to women.

Cranberry loves the ladies.

Looking forward to 2008

New Year Resolutions

1. Lose 5kgs
I think this one will be on a lot of people’s lists. That’s why department store ads are always peddling exercise equipment and snazzy new spandex workout duds, and bookstores front titles like The Low Fat Cookbook and You Too Can Have Rock Hard Abs in January. ^^

2. Try yoga
This could help with the above. I’m thinking about Bikram yoga, though I honestly don’t know what that entails.

3. Sing more
Christmas Eve I karaoked to Otsuka Ai and Anna Nalick songs and it was so much fun! Someone should have a karaoke party and invite me. ♥

4. Blog more
I’ve done really well with updating, at the very least on a weekly basis, but I have a tendency to ignore my LJ for weeks at a time when I’m busy with work or being an emo-kid. Also, if I’m going to blog more, I should probably do more interesting things…

5. Become a more interesting person
For the benefit of everyone, really. ^^

6. Keep a non-LJ, public blog
I have a wordpress now, I just need to get around to using it.

7. Travel someplace new

8. Write more
Of the non-blogging, Scrivener-needing sort

9. Continue to read more

10. Meet new people
Because you only need three good friends to be “self-actualized” (?), but adding more never hurts.

11. Attend a mass
I’m agnostic, but I want to attend a church service with the opportunity to enjoy it. I only need one hand to count the number of times I’ve been inside a church and all of them were terrible experiences, one of which involved a crazy “healer” and his gift shop. My childhood was so traumatizing. ;__;

I’m picky though, the church has to be fancy. I’m not asking for the Sistine Chapel (but if anyone wants to take me…), but there must be stained glass, the whole shebang.

12. Floss

13. Save for a Mac
To become a “hip”, “sexy”, “creative, non-linear” thinker and Mac-user

14. Leave as many negative feelings as possible in 2007
I guess this more like a pre-New Year resolution. But I really want to start 2008 as empty-handed and light-hearted as possible. Less drama this year plz.

A lot can happen in a year, I think these goals are feasible.

“That sound you heard. That was my mind, being blown.”

Sunday and Monday I was without all electrically powered devices, including heat and running water. Apparently a strong winter wind and some freezing rain took down a tree and tore into the powerline in front of Nick’s house.

The radio said they were using the OV middle school as a shelter, so a lot of people must have been without power. A guest at work told me she still didn’t have power on Wednesday.

I’m no Laura Ingalls, but I managed to occupy my time without all the modern convenience. It was only frustrating in the moments I remembered the huge list of Must Dos sitting in my pocket, all of which required electricity in some form.

Wednesday evening, more sudden and unexpected than ever before, I got very sick. It might be flu, but it feels like I’m getting better rather than worse, so I’m not too worried. It’s more uncomfortable and inconvenient than anything.

Christmas surprised me too. Even having to fight my way through swarms of last-minute-shoppers and mall traffic today, it still doesn’t feel like Christmas should be Tuesday. I got so confused when people gave me presents this week and asked about holiday baking. I don’t even have time to think of my Best Of for this year; I guess I should just start on my resolutions and plans for next year.

Unrelated, the trailers for Final Fantasy XIII and Versus are excellent, but I’m still hoping they don’t arrive in the States anytime soon. It seems crazy to buy a PS3, as much as it is, just to play one title. This is one of the times I wish I had a flatmate, so we could split the cost of a system.

There’s also Dissidia to look forward to. But that requires a PSP.

a few quick notes

I got my Chinese essay back today. I was alarmed when I didn’t see any writing on the first page; I was expecting a lot of corrections. On the second page I saw red ink, but it was only noting my perfect score and a compliment that translates to something like “Your essay is well-written. Both your essay and your writing of characters are very beautiful.”

It definitely made up for the fact that our classroom had no heat this morning. (It’s hard to take notes when you can’t feel your hands.)

And I take back what I said earlier, it was worth the aggravation to write and it’ll be worth the aggravation when I try to memorize it for next Wednesday’s oral exam (last day of class before the new year, yes!). I’m glad I took the risk rather than the quick and easy route.

For anyone wondering what I wrote about: The friends I love, the languages I love, one of my many dreams for the future, and… Hamasaki Ayumi.

Also, today I finished City of Bones, and yesterday, Alice Sebold’s The Lovely Bones, which I read by candlelight during an extended power-outage. I’ll try to comment on both later.

And I should have a new cellphone number come January 1st as I bought a new phone today and it’s with a different company (and will hopefully cost me less! No more 50-dollar-a-month paperweight, thank you!). I’ve named him Jacob and I’m going to put the Hello Kitty charm I bought when I went Christmas shopping with Steph on him. I hope he doesn’t feel emasculated.

On the First Day of Twilight spam, my true love gave to me…

Robert Pattinson has been cast as Edward Cullen for the Twilight movie. While he is not what I envisioned when reading the books, I’m perfectly fine taking a “wait and see” stance. He’s certainly not ugly and any good makeup artist, wardrobe specialist, pair of contacts, and proper lighting can transform any kind of guy into a sexy vampire. It’s the magic of Hollywood. *sparkle*

And if Robert Pattinson isn’t ringing a mental bell, he played Cedric Diggory in the fourth Harry Potter movie. Because HP manages to eat its way through all my interests, apparently. (I’m looking at you, Sweeny Todd.)

And for those not in the know, Isabella Swan was the first role cast. She went to Kristen Stewart.

I do love the fandom-cast Gaspard Ulliel and Emily Browning, but my expectations for the movie are set low, so I think I could live with any casting choices the director/Summit/whoever makes.

The only thing I’m not thrilled about is that Stephanie Meyer has absolutely zero say in the production of the movie.

It has been a while since I read Amy Tan’s The Opposite of Fate (it’s one of my favourite books!), but when The Joy Luck Club was made into a movie I’m fairly certain she was there for the adapted script, audition screenings, various meetings and phone calls, and filming, even when filming meant risking hypothermia and angry villagers in China. I think she felt overtaxed and expressed a desire to be less involved at some point, but the important thing is that if something was done with her story that truly bothered her, she had the option to argue and rewrite.

If I ever sell a novel, I will be very careful when doling out subsidiary rights. I’ll be sure to reserve the right to be opinionated with whatever publisher that stakes a claim in my print rights.

Stephanie does care though. Excerpt from her myspace:

By the time I was done with my research (writing: a line of work where you can legitimately call drooling over hot boys “research.”), I was kind of shocked that I’d never considered Robert before. Aside from my dearest Henry, Robert is truly the first person I’ve pictured in the role who I think can pull it off. The boy just looks like a vampire.

Also, I hear very encouraging things from the people who watched his auditions. They’ve been at this for months now, you know, reading Edward hopefuls day after day. Robert knocked their socks off; once he read for the part, the search was over. In other good news, apparently there is excellent chemistry between Robert and Kristen (they have all the major actors read together to make sure they fit), his American accent is flawless, AND he’s read all three novels!

Yes, I will be at the theatre opening day. *takes a fangirl moment* Twilight movie, YAY! ♥

But would the Hiltons believe I was their long-lost daughter and would they buy me a mac?

So, I was spending my Saturday late-night reading authors’ blogs and lusting over Scrivener, a program that manages large writing projects.

What exactly makes Scrivener so great, you ask? Well…

Research, scrawling fragmentary ideas that don’t seem to fit anywhere yet, collecting faded photos from old newspapers, shuffling index cards to find that elusive structure – most writing software is only fired up after much of the hard work is already done. Enter Scrivener: writing software that stays with you from that first, unformed idea all the way through to the first – or even final – draft. Outline and structure your ideas. Take notes. Storyboard your masterpiece using a powerful virtual corkboard. View research while you write. Track themes using keywords. Dynamically combine multiple scenes into a single text just to see how they fit. Scrivener has already been enthusiastically adopted by best-selling novelists and novices alike – whatever you write, grow your ideas in style.

“Excellent!” I thought. And the program looks so clean and pretty. Look at all its shiny features!

It is particularly suited to writers who don’t always think in a linear fashion – who don’t always start at the beginning and end at the end, it said and I was delighted. “When I can be bothered to think, it’s totally not in a linear fashion!” I responded.

There’s even an extra discount for students, educators, and the general poor and low-income peoples.

It was kismet! I was in love and already mentally figuring what could be done away with to make a home for this fantastic program on Sesso, my computer. Then I read the sidebar, Please note that Scrivener does not run on any version of Windows – it requires a Mac running OS X Tiger or above…

*sound of a plane crashing* Draaat. What happened to the days everything was Windows compatible and nothing worked for Mac? I was even ready to cough up the less-than-$40 for a legitimate copy rather than going through the normal shifty-eyed bootlegger resources.

Ah, the disappointment. It burns.